There’s hope for friendship after breakup

We’ve been wanting to post this for a while, and I’m finally got a chance to do it. We got an email from Lincoln in response to Episode 50 – “Can we be just friends?”. Here it is:

I’ve been a listener to all (50!) of your podcasts and I enjoy both the banter and different perspectives on dating and life in general. I may disagree with one or two things you guys come up with here or there, but overall I think you’re generally on the mark and you almost always  cover all sides of an issue.
That said, I vehemently disagree with the consensus of your last episode on being friends with an ex. I think I’m a little older than you, but the woman I dated prior to my current relationship was someone I knew years ago (she was the friend of a friend) that I connected with about a year ago. She and I were friendly before, but not independent of our mutual friend. Anyway, we dated for about 6 months or so and the relationship wasn’t progressing as I’d have liked, so I ended it. After a brief period, we resumed our friendship and we speak very regularly now. When I was passing through where she lives (she lives a couple hours away) I stopped by and we had dinner. My current girlfriend knows about her, and is fine with our relationship. Though they haven’t met yet, I imagine they will the next time my ex- is in town (she’s here for business a few times a year).
The fact that you guys dismissed the potential ability to be friends with an ex so completely was a little surprising as you usually are very balanced in your assessment of almost any issue.
I remain a fan and am looking forward to next weeks show!
ldc

Tags: , ,

2 Comments

  1. avatar lovebytesPC says:

    Hey guys, Kirk here. While I agree that it is possible to be friends with your ex, I really don't the appeal of it. I honestly think that if a relationship didn't work out between you two, why would you want to be friends again?

  2. avatar Pacific says:

    Well, Kirk, it doesn't sound like you keep the distinction between "relationship" and "friends" very clear then. To me, relationship involves intimacy in several levels (not just sex) and friendships are NOT going there. I know it can be a challenge to keep strong (in my experience) about boundaries AFTER changing over from "relationship" to "Friends". Thanks.

Leave a Reply

Contact Information

Phone Number:
(818) 570-DATE (3283)

Email:
[email protected]

RSS Feed:
http://feeds.feedburner.com/ LoveBytesPodcast